Purpose
Why do I have a website?
This question was haunting me for a long time. One day a simple child (a seventy-year-old seeker) gave me the answer.
He said, “If we do not get a chance to know how you live, act, react and interact with outer world how can we know whether your attainment is true or fake? Masters have come and gone from time immemorial but few have left their imprints on the hearts of yogis. When you teach something and do not give us a chance to see whether or not your life is manifesting your teachings then yoga becomes a philosophy or a pastime hobby. How can we receive guidance? Who will face the missiles of the mental being if not the one who is known to be enlightened?”
I got my answer. A voice spoke from within. Rama, Krishna, Buddha, Jesus, everyone has made their life visible. That is what has sustained religion, tradition, human culture and spirituality. Why not I follow the path shown by all the wise men? What is there for me to lose except my ego and ignorance?
My purpose is you, to push you to the state where I am today. That is the best way to make you understand what is yoga and make me see where is my ego. This is a challenge and I have accepted this.
I have a vision.
I have a vision. This is about you the individual and you the universal. As an individual I aspired to reach a state of consciousness when nothing could touch me. I did not want God or the Self. All I wanted was to know, understand and feel always that I am not the body, mind or not even the soul. I wanted to feel I am all, everything, beyond and above.
Now I sincerely feel I am that. After reaching this state I felt I wanted to live for the manifestation of this vision. For that I decided to work, toil, struggle and strive. Failure, success, profit, loss, fame, pain, pleasure, life, death – these terms have lost their meaning to me. I am not alone feeling “that.” People who come and stay with me, near me, work for me, also sometimes feel “that”.
To make this feeling of unity a normal state for millions of human beings on Earth is my vision as a spiritual being. You may call it madness but it is for this that I am working.
“Astrology is the eye of the Vedas.”
OM Namo Bhagavate
A personal account of one devotee’s experience with Swamiji.
“Astrology is the eye of the Vedas.” Swami Sri Atmananda, Patanjali Workshop, 2015.
2016 marks the fifteenth year of my association with a “mystic” lovingly addressed as “Swamiji”. A mystic, by definition, is one who apprehends the spiritual truth that is beyond human intellect. I had the great fortune of spending many mystical moments with Swamiji that would often leave me bewildered and confused, and at times, shocked. These moments would sometimes carry such a force that it seemed they could affect a seeker’s inner being for years and sometimes even his lifetime. Little did I know that the accumulated effects of these moments would soon take over the reins of my mind, heart, and eventually destiny. During the past four years, not a single day has gone by when I was not contemplating on one or more of these moments—either trying to understand the hidden meaning behind Swamiji’s utterances or patiently waiting for his predictions to come true. On the occasion of Swamiji’s birthday, I wish to share one such incident from my early days with him. Another reason I am sharing this is because I feel I now peripherally understand why he did what he did.
I was in my early 20s when most of my in-person interactions with Swamiji took place. Back in those days, his spiritual organization was just starting out and relatively small; this freed up a lot of his time to interact with outside visitors to the ashram. He would make himself available for teaching meditation techniques to visitors and ashramites alike, and hold several discourse sessions each week. I felt such deep admiration for Swamiji that I thought I should take up a monastic life in order to be with him for the rest of my days. One day, at the height of these feelings, Swamiji highly encouraged me to go to America for my higher education, as part of his spiritual mission. My logical mind found this nonsensical—it seemed that no spiritual master would want his loving devotees to leave his sight and get lost in the material mires of this world. This seemed especially true for a novice seeker like me who had just started his spiritual quest, and faced every possibility of getting derailed from the track.
I soon cleared the GRE exams and per Swamiji’s instructions, applied to a number of American universities for my post-graduate studies. This was in2002, right after 9/11, when it became increasingly difficult for international students to obtain financial aid from US universities. Without financial aid, my chances of attending a US university were slim to none. My family was adamant on not financially supporting me beyond my bachelor’s degree, and wouldn’t even assist me in taking out a bank loan to fund my foreign trip. I had almost given up hope and made up my mind to pursue Plan B: take a company job in India and pursue my spiritual interests by remaining in close proximity to Swamiji.
On the 18th of June, 2003, much to my family’s and my surprise, Swamiji called me at my home in Assam with the following message.. He was apparently in a state of trance (Samadhi) when he said, to the best of my recollections: “Mark my words…I know your past, present, and future…you are destined to go to the US…start preparing for the journey…everything will be arranged for you by the Lord.” It was a unidirectional dialogue: he spoke and I listened. Later I learned from the ashramites that he had locked himself up for almost two days in his room to remain in Samadhi during his birthday. It was during that time that he called me.
His voice over the phone seemed impersonal, instructive, and lacking any human emotion. I can still remember the feeling that had erupted in me from listening to him that day. The unearthly force transmitted over the phone lines deprived me of sleep for nearly two nights afterward. As Swamiji foretold, I received full scholarship for my entire post-graduate education in the US. His blessings have incessantly been pouring on me and carrying me ever since, and presently, I am a professor in a highly ranked US university.
During my second year in the US, I asked Swamiji how he knew my future, and more importantly, how I was spiritually benefitting his mission and myself by completing my studies in the US. During that period, I had no time for spiritual practices. I was completely deluged by academics, which were purely material in nature. His reply, as I recall, was “Completing your PhD and becoming a reputed scientist is the best spiritual practice you can do for yourself at this stage of your life…In Gita’s language it is your swadharma. All spiritual knowledge is already inside of you,.. It’s only a matter of time before it will reveal itself to you”
Not satisfied with this qualitative answer, I visited him the following year at his Ashram, and again asked the above question. This time, he gave a different answer “I know your astrological chart… My role as a sadguru is to be patient and deliver you from maya (illusion)…this might take one year, one birth, or multiple births…Enlightenment happens as a lightning strike and hence the name…I wish to be able to see at least a dozen of my devotees enlightened in my lifetime, and to each I prescribe different solutions per his system’s needs.”
Still not quite satisfied at his explanation, I further asked which astrologer he consulted to read my chart. He laughed and said that Maharshi Bhrigu had taught him to read spiritual charts during his Nirvikalpa samadhi in the Arunachala cave. Thus inspired, I left the ashram and obtained a copy of my own birth chart from my mother, and started teaching myself the tenets of astrology during my free time.
For the next several years, I delved into numerous interpretations of the classical astrological texts by ancient Vedic sages Parashara and Jaimini. These texts highlight the importance of Rahu and Ketu—the two nodes of moon—in granting spiritual enlightenment to a seeker.
Rahu in a person’s birth chart digs out the hidden desires from the depths of one’s subconscious mind, brings them to the conscious mind, and helps materialize them. The scriptures further explain that no amount of meditation and spiritual practice can stop Rahu from doing its part in one’s chart. Yogis fall from their spiritual attainments typically during the influence of Rahu in their chart. Only after Rahu’s role in one’s life is over, Ketu (its counterpart) takes over to bestow enlightenment to the soul.
When I understood this, and learned that Rahu is in my ninth house of higher education and foreign travel, I felt that I then understood why Swamiji had insisted on me coming to the US for higher studies. Had he not done so, I would have to deal with this subconscious desire later in this life or in future births. Spiritual emancipation wouldn’t be possible without this critical astrological intervention by Swamiji.
It took me almost 10 years to realize what seems to be at least part of the spiritual significance of one of Swamiji’s many mystical actions. On a personal level, since my becoming a professor in 2014, I’ve felt a paradigm shift in my consciousness, whereby the mind seems to be naturally turning inward and the level of spiritual aspiration and focus has increased by an order of magnitude. At first I couldn’t understand why. But now it’s starting to make sense.
In Paramhansa Yogananda’s book Autobiography of a Yogi, he describes his guru, Swami Yukteshwar Giri, influencing the astrological forces for the sake of expediting the spiritual progress of his disciples. A similar cosmic phenomenon might be at play here for those associated with Swamiji. To this mystical, selfless, and mightily powerful form called Swamiji, I offer my humblest pranam and best wishes on his birthday.
His Loving Devotee.
18th June 2016
Question 1
OM Namo Bhagavate
Can a wife be an obstacle to yoga?
From: SR -99.
Blessed Gurudev,
For long time I have thought that I am trapped by my wife. She doesn’t allow me to do my sadhana and very often makes me feel irritated due to her senseless actions. What should I do to get rid of this problem? You have said that yoga for the modern man is absolutely possible in a family environment but here I feel it is impossible.
Answer
You are not alone to think like this.
The majority of husbands think like you, and many wives also think in the similar ways. This feeling is the symptom of one who is stuck-up in yoga, one who actually does not want to put effort into yoga. I have no hesitation to say that your determination to succeed in yoga has weakened. Otherwise you will not blame your wife for your inability to do yoga. Modern-day husbands many a time pass on the blame to wives.
Yoga is not a battle between husband and wife. It is an inner battle to overcome all samskaras. Patanjali, the father of Ashtanga yoga, has explained this in the very beginning of his yoga sutras: “Athah yoganusasanam,” which means yoga is an anusasana, self-imposed discipline. (Sutra 1.) It should not be a sasana, or externally imposed discipline. Submitting to external discipline is slavery where as submitting to anusasana is the beginning of self-mastery.
Now I will tell you about my experience when I was in your stage of sadhana. To be very truthful I do not recollect a single instance when my wife was irritated with me because I was doing yoga. Rather it was just the opposite. She was irritated when I was deviating from the path of yoga. For me yoga was not sitting silently for meditation or visiting temples or listening to discourses or bhajans. Yoga for me was a constant striving to be truthful, sincere and dedicated to my ordained duties and responsibilities. Yoga for me was my daily Gita chanting and maintaining my state of equanimity. I have found that my wife was never getting irritated when I was struggling with this sadhana.
Please look within and find out what it is in you that causes irritation in you. I am sure you will find out soon it is not your wife but your attachments to your notions of yoga that might be the cause of your irritations.
Love and Blessings,
Gurudev
[Swamiji answers sadhana-related questions from seekers and admirers. To submit a question, use the Contact page. Each seeker receives a code number so that the inquirer will remain anonymous.]
Question 2
Om Namo Bhagavate
Why do a majority of seekers not attain yoga siddhi?
[This question was asked by Swamiji himself.]
“Truth Hurts but It Heals”
My Experience as a Master
When I was not a seeker I was always asking this question to me, to others and even to God. The question was, why do a majority of seekers not attain yoga siddhi? When I encountered a sadhu wearing an ochre robe or a loincloth, or a mendicant, the first question I was asking if the situation permitted was, “For how many years are you doing yoga?” I used to ask the same question to all. I was surprised, shocked and many a time also feeling a deep sadness in me when I heard these seekers and sadhus telling me something like, “I am doing yoga for the last 20 years, 25 years, 30 years,” etc.
When I then asked, “What have you gained in these 20, 25, 30 years?” almost everyone was looking at me with surprise that I was asking such a question. Only on a few occasions, maybe three or four times during my 20 years of constant inner search, someone asked a counter-question: “Why are you asking this?”
People derive a vicarious satisfaction simply by leading a mendicant life. 90 percent of these seekers really do not know what yoga is. Out of the rest, hardly two to three percent really do yoga. Why? Because the initial euphoria about yoga usually evaporates after the first three years of awakening. What remains is just the tag of social recognition and a yogic identity card. A majority of these seekers do not have a Guru or Guide. Hardly they follow any scripture or path and rarely any rigid self-discipline. Yoga for these spiritual romantics has become a time-pass hobby.
I also saw the real picture of the spiritual masters. A majority of these masters have no grounding on any scripture nor do they have any mastery over senses. Neither their personal lives are clean nor their social lives are admirable. Many masters in many ashrams are more money-minded than a miser and more indulgent than a drug addict. Women, wealth and weapon are the three symbols of their power and authority.
It is really a great mystery for me how after seeing all this hypocrisy and falsehood I still was able to retain my love for sadhus and my aspiration for yoga.
Now as I look back, 35 years down the memory lane, as a master, I see three truths in the relative plane.
Truth No.1:
It is a fact that true seekers are very rare in this Kali Yuga. The majority of seekers are actually sattwa-driven human beings, those who come to the yoga path. In my experience of 22 years as a master, I have so far not even seen 22 seekers whom I can truly consider as striving yogis. Hundreds have come to me for receiving guidance for yoga, but I have not found even 20 true seekers in these 22 years as a master whose only mission in life is to guide an awakened soul to the stage of Realization or Liberation.
I have an Ashram in one of the most famous spiritual places in India and the ashram gates are always open for seekers, but I find mostly spiritual romantics, spiritual tourists and sattwa-driven human beings coming to the Ashram. Most painful is my experience as a master with those seekers who stay with me to do yoga.
A majority of ashramites always find an excuse how not to attend an Ashram program. It is most shocking to me to see how ashramites just go out for their material and social chores even when chanting, invocation or Guru Puja is going on in the campus. Many even do not feel the need to chant a chapter of Gita or a sukta from the Veda, which are considered the basic scriptures in our Ashram. I cannot remember a single ashramite who is able to attend all the Ashram programs, although no one misses a single meal in the Ashram dining hall.
Recently I returned from a tour of USA. My experience and observations were no different there. Nowadays we hear lot about pseudo masters, but has anyone ever asked himself whether he/she is a pseudo seeker?
I am sharing my experiences with the world not to blame or glorify anyone but to make a simple, obvious point more obvious. That is, why do a majority of seekers not attain yoga siddhi?
My answer is,
they do not really want it.
To be continued…
[Swamiji answers sadhana-related questions from seekers and admirers. To submit a question, use the Contact page. Each seeker receives a code number so that the inquirer will remain anonymous.]